That special someone

So.. Now I've been single for .. Over a half year now.

Not that I mind. I am just starting to feel a little.. Lonely.

I miss being hold close..

The warm tender kisses..

The way I can look into this person's eyes and feel, my whole stomach being filled with butterflies because, I know that they're mine.

Just laying in bed and being bored together, not doing anything all day.

I see everyone getting pared up with someone.

'' I've never been happier! '' '' I just love him/her so much! ''

.. Not that I ain't happy for them. I just... Don't really feel like I'm.. Attractive? At all.. 

I never really have though, so it's not something new..

That's maybe why I turned Pansexual? ..Or... Not the ONLY reason.

I don't really care about the looks or the gender. I care about what's on the inside. The personality. Probably why I fall so easily in love... *sigh*

I guess I just have to wait some more.. Till the special someone finds me.

Crazy stupid love.

Beautiful.

Finally, when someone likes you, you push them away.

Because you don't have the same feelings. Couldn't you at least try!?

Gosh! 

And then you are .. Stupidly in love.

Great. 

Well, I can't do anything else, than pushing the feelings away.

Ha.. Besides.. Who want to be with someone like me? 

All I can do, is to break hearts.

Make people cry. Hurt them. Disappoint them.

Love is so... Complicated.. But why? I don't get it..

It's just.... Crazy stupid love.

Run.

I'll sing it one last time for you

Then we really have to go

You've been the only thing that's right

In all I've done

And I can barely look at you

But every single time I do

I know we'll make it anywhere

Away from here.

Light up,

light up

as if you have a choice 

Even if you cannot hear, my voice

I'll be right beside you, dear

Louder,

louder

And we'll run for our lives

I can hardly speak

I understand 

Why you can't raise you're voice to say

To think I might not see those eyes

Makes it so hard not to cry

And as we say out long goodbyes

I nearly do

Light up,

light up

as if you have a choice 

Even if you cannot hear, my voice

I'll be right beside you, dear

Louder,

louder

And we'll run for our lives

I can hardly speak

I understand 

Why you can't raise you're voice to say

Slower,

slower

We don't have time for that

All I want is to find an easier way

To get out of our little heads

Have heart

My dear

We're bound to be afraid

Even if it's just for a few days

Making up for all this mess

Light up,

light up

as if you have a choice 

Even if you cannot hear, my voice

I'll be right beside you, dear.

hmm..

Jeg hader det her..

På min gamle skole lærte jeg næsten ikke noget..

Derfor er jeg meget mere bagud end de andre. Især i matematik.. Jeg bliver så fustreret når vi får en test. Det er over halvdelen af tingene, jeg overhovedet ikke kan svare på..

Alle i min nye klasse er gode til det... Til alt sådanset.. Jeg kan intet..

Vi lavede et projekt her for nogle dage siden.. Jeg blev bedt om at læse nogle simple ligninger men.. Jeg vidste ikke hvordan man gjorde.. Så min ven tog over..

Jeg blev spurgt om noget i klassen men.. Jeg kunne ikke svare på det.. Sagde noget mundlort.. Gjorde mig selv til grin..

Kæft jeg kunne tude der.. Pernille kunne godt se jeg blev skuffet over mig selv.. Eller ihvertfald at jeg blev nedtrykt..

Heh.. Man kan da heller ikke være ked af det på den skole..

----------------------------

''I've been spending way too long checking my tongue in the mirror

And bending over backwards just to try to see it clearer

But my breath fogged up the glass

And so I drew a new face and I laughed

I guess what I've been saying is there ain't no better reason

To rid yourself of vanities and just go with the seasons

It's what we aim to do

Our name is our virtue

I won't hesitate no more, no more

It cannot wait

 I'm yours''

Empty inside

I cut myself to see if i still feel.

I bleed a little,

I could kill.

All the scars on my wrist.

Shows how many times I got pissed.

Look at all this blood on the floor.

My heart is saying "Just a little more,"

I feel so empty inside.

Maybe I should just hide.

Theres to much pain,

I'm going insane.

One day,

When I use that knife,

It's going to cut my vein,

And end my life. 

No...

I'm hurt all the time. 

I don't want to cry for the way I feel inside.

I just want someone to hold me...

I'm alone in the dark, please try to find me.

If no one cares, I don't see a point to go on.

Anyone find me! Anyone care!

I'm sorry, I just don't want to be alone anymore.

I feel unheard and unseen. Depressed and weak. 

No one cares and yet I'm always the sorry one.

Someone find me! I'm scared. 

Please hold me until it all ends.

Just hold me that’s all I want.

I don't want to be alone in the dark.

Just hold me as I start to disappear from the light.

Just hold me as I start to cry.

Just hold me so I wont be alone inside.

Just hold me so I don't do something wrong.

Just hold me so tight, that for a moment I could feel the light..